Dear extremely good-looking boy,
So I hear you're real immature. That's so uncool. I will just have to admire your effortless style, defined cheekbones, sharp jawline, long legs and adorable freckles from afar.
Dear Mademoiselle Reed,
Sharing feelings is hard to do - especially in my case. And to be honest, I know this un-talent of mine will never get me anywhere in life. But I finally gathered up my courage and took a stab at it that time. Scariest thing ever. Best thing ever. All at the same time. Who knew? Thanks for understanding.
Dear blue-eyed lone-wolf,
I don't know why but I'd like to get to know you. Let's overcome the awkward turtle, first of all.
I believe your name was Brandon? Please be the boy who delivers the books next time. And the time after that, too. You are hilarious. Do that impersonation of Rupert Grint again.
Dear Victoria Beckham,
I just saw your Spring 2011 ready-to-wear collection, and I must say, I loved it! You have proven that you're not just a fashionista, but also a serious designer. But now, to wear your dresses, one has to have a perfect body. On the side note, I adored your range of structured hand bags and sparkling sunglasses. The collection was definitely a lady-like affair.
Dear Tony & Guy refreshing dry shampoo,
What a discovery you are. Thanks for saving my flat and/or greasy hair hair days. If only you came in a smaller packs, so I could secretly carry you in my handbag.
Dear immune system,
What is wrong with you? You are so retarded. Why go into defence response and release a tonne of histamines and drive me mad with itches all the time? You are fighting a false enemy! Chronic urticaria sucks.
Dear Prayer Station,
Be a vessel of love, hope, and compassion for the lost in this city. Show the way to freedom and truth for the hopeless and burdened.
Dear whom it may concern,
Wake me up when september ends. I am so sleep-deprived and there is so much I'd rather not do.